This house believes…

…that you’d best get inside it.

At about 250 seats a show and only 22 performances, a mere 5500 Portlanders (max) will get a chance to see the upcoming sardines-a-palooza (aka NOISES OFF) at Third Rail.

That’s really not very many. That’s the number of people waiting in line for the jacks at a Timbers game. Or backed up in traffic daily at 5pm on the Fremont Parking Lot. I mean Bridge.

If this show catches fire the way it should, there are going to be quite a few UNHAPPY campers who did not get their tickets ahead of time. Like they were told to. Repeatedly.

But surely you, dear reader (being all in the know – and all), won’t miss this rare chance to see Portland’s boldest and best big theatre company taking a run at the Godzilla of all British farces.

Will you?

PLUS it’s dead center in the end of year holiday slot! What else are you waiting for?! Free beer? A personal invitation? A vigorous acting lesson and massage from Lloyd Dallas (while he simultaneously posts on all social media known to humankind)?

Miss this farce-pocalypse – and you’d better be prepared to endure lengthy questioning and electronic surveillance c/o the NSA, as they seek to understand the inner workings (or not) of your brain. And believe me, those people do NOT have a light touch.

It all starts Friday at the P5PCPA Arts Centre Performance Complex.

Which is right next to the Schnitzer on SW Broadway.

PS: #TRRTNoisesOff

Uh huh.

Fill this house.  Will one of these seats be yours?
Fill this house. Will one of these seats be yours?